the real blue ruin.

[quigonejinn]

I've been mainlining Georgette Heyer since destronomics suggested a Regency romance!AU back in, like, the week after the movie came out. As far as I can tell, the plot to every single one of them goes roughly like this:

1. Beautiful heroine has characteristic that the author is pretending is a flaw.
2. Beautiful heroine meets handsome, rich gentleman who she does not think she is attracted to.
3. Beautiful heroine is in a scrape!!! Preferably because of her characteristic that that the author is pretending is a flaw.
4. Handsome, rich gentleman proves his worth by getting her out of the scrape.
5. MAWWIAGE!

This does not exactly fit FC. FC, after all, ends with the theme that it is acceptable and morally permissible to walk away from your brother while he is injured on the beach in order to embrace your destiny to incite species war. And most of fandom is interested in Regency romance!AU mostly so that Charles and Erik can prance about in pantaloons and talk about mills, whereas a Regency romance plot guidelines seem to dictate that it should be about Raven along the following lines:

1. Beautiful heroine has the flaw of BEING BLUE IF SHE IS NOT SHAPESHIFTING.*
2. Beautiful heroine meets rich ten year old who offers to take care of her forever.
3. Beautiful heroine meets handsome, not-rich-doesn't-care, insta-best friend of grown-up rich ten year old.
4. Handsome, not-rich-doesn't-care, insta-best friend of grown-up rich ten year old points out to beautiful heroine that her problem isn't really a problem. What does she need the ten year old to take care of her if she is beautiful as a tiger?
5. WHEELCHAIR TIME

With a big ol' side of Charles Xavier hoping, with part of him, that Erik and Raven are going to get married. Because then, he'll have them both forever -- he can't say it, but one night, Raven comes to kiss him goodnight after Erik and Charles are done playing chess, and the image of the house he would build them pops into her mind the second her lips touch his cheek. On the south field, above the woods, with wide windows and marble columns. He loves both of them so much. He would find a way to leave everything he owned to their children, no matter what they were like.

And a tub of Raven turning into Charles to do what she needs to do, including ride that monster blood bay that Erik has seen in the stable. Charles rides just well enough to be a gentleman, and Erik has never seen even go into the stable yard. That blood bay is a step -- two steps, really -- better than anything in the stable, and Erik, in the field at dawn, seeing Raven struggling to get it to take a fence. At first, she wears Charles's face, but when she realizes it's him, she slips into her blonde form. The horse won't take the wall, but after Erik says that line about concentration to Raven, she goes blue and vaults over it without even thinking about it.

Basically, I want These Old Shades (which is not Regency at all) with extra athleticism and murder and paralysis.











* Dubcon porn version: Charles is worried that Raven will freak out and go blue on her wedding night. The way to cure her of this is clearly for her to sit on a couch and him to sit in an armchair by the fire, each of them with books in their lap, while Charles fucks her over the armoire inside their brains. The curtains are drawn; snow is falling outside, and the door is locked.

It would be stupid hot, and look, if Raven had a dick in her blue form, fandom would have gone there two weeks ago.

Comments

[furius]

My knowledge of Regency Romances come exclusively from fanfics (really) but..there's this whole thing about whether her BLUE FORM is her natural form. Presumably she wasn't born blue, but one that manifests later in life. It's pretty much an accent for her a la Pygmalion/My Fair Lady It's quite unfair of fandom/Erik to accuse Charles of not embracing Raven as she is. It's not only the fact that BLUE FORM startles people, it's also the converse fact that Raven in BLUE is not necessarily Raven, at least to Charles? Why should she be defined by her mutation (I kind of..cannot forgive Erik for offering the tiger analogy), or rather, her looks? There's no discussion....no mutual understanding at all.

In conclusion: Charles CANNOT communicate without mind-reading.

Interesting point in that fandom tend to go for Raven!Charles bottoming...

[possibly_thrice]

Oh I was going to say something here but then I read the footnote and my brain melted out of my ears and lay hot and liquid on the carpet. WHOOPS.

[quigonejinn]

There is a criminal lack of Charles/Raven in this universe. Just absolutely fucking criminal.

[grey_bard]

I would be ALL OVER THAT... Though I admit I would love it if she gets to stay bisexual like in the comics, though not necessarily acting upon it during the story.

[quigonejinn]

:D I think it's a given.

[destronomics]

Charles is worried that Raven will freak out and go blue on her wedding night. The way to cure her of this is clearly for her to sit on a couch and him to sit in an armchair by the fire, each of them with books in their lap, while Charles fucks her over the armoire inside their brains.

I. Um. Holy shit.

Can we just port this over to Movieverse real quick where Charles is scared of girls and Raven helps him practice? In their heads, of course. The idealized version of Adult!Charles, the one Raven holds very, very still despite a few, traitorous giggles that escape while he fumbles his mouth in her lap (the one with the broad shoulders, the smaller mouth, and the extra dozen centimeters in height that never manifest) and becomes something of an inside joke between the two of them later on down the line when Charles' mouth is still too wide, and he never quite grows into his nose like Raven assured him he could?

[quigonejinn]

Yes, yes, we are there, along with Charles asking Raven if she is sure this is what girl parts look like and how a girl would react and whether regular girls shiver like that when they come. "You should find out," Raven says. In their heads, her ankle is resting on his shoulder; in regular life, she is sitting at a table, eating cereal from the box, and he has a glass of orange juice in front of him. The maid is bringing Charles's breakfast in.

[destronomics]

whether regular girls shiver like that when they come.

oh jesus charles you are the worst (keep up the good work!)

Of course Charles doesn't think of what he's asking. It's a skill, like any other, it's only prudent to go to an expert for that sort of thing, right?