Because you're right, if he had a doctorate he'd insist on everyone calling him "DOCTOR STARKSTER" all the time because he's an ASS and would totally get off on it.

YES, YES HE WOULD. So, probably no doctorate.

"Lets get married and then you can't testify against me!"

Okay, you do realize that now you're going to have to write that. Because if you don't do it first, somebody else will do it, and they will do it so terribly that we will all die of the cosmic stench.
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