(no subject)

[quigonejinn]

Tony's official thirty-fifth birthday party involved five hundred servings of lobster tail, six ice sculptures, three tents, a fireworks display, Cirque du Soleil, Dita Von Teese, four elephants bearing mahouts and Vegas showgirls, a polar bear, the president of Boeing, half the board of Halliburton, and Mick Jagger. There were also fountains -- literally, fountains -- of Cristal, and after hour six, even Tony started showing his inebriation. He paged Pepper four times without a response, so he went looking for her.

She was, in fact, alone in a banquette at the edge of things, tucked underneath an oversized man's tuxedo jacket. This pleased Tony for an obscure reason. The world would probably have been a wrong place if Pepper was drunk at her boss's birthday party, and fireworks were going off over the lake. The polar bear had caught scent of the elephants and was roaring.

"It's my birthday, Pepper, but I'm going to give you a present," Tony said, sitting down next to her. It was his birthday party, so he'd slur his speech if he wanted to.

At least, that was what he would say to her if she told him to stop drinking. Pepper didn't say anything, so Tony added, "No, don't thank me. That's just the kind of guy I am. So here's what I'm going to give you for my birthday, Pepper. I'm going to settle down with a nice woman. Maybe we'll get married. Have some kids. I won't be such a hassle for you to handle."

Surely, this would produce a respon -- oh. She was asleep. Probably tired from arranging the polar bear, so Tony patted Pepper on the shoulder, heaved himself to his feet, and went off to look for a woman at the party, besides Pepper and Vida Halliburton, that he hadn't already slept with.








. . . yes, it is for the best, I think, that I cannot write comedy. But I cannot stop loving the idea of of it all. Tony, knocking back shots at Koi with, like, Lindsay Lohan because it's the responsible thing to do!. The massive Pepper eye-rolling and desperate damage control! Sam Ronson TP'ing the Stark palm trees!

I mean, just think of the Brangelina type names. :D :D :D