quigonejinn: (qui gon - come child come rescue me)
quigonejinn ([personal profile] quigonejinn) wrote2005-11-15 11:26 am
Entry tags:

The Lives of Pirates.



Waves. Sunshine. The sound of water lapping at the sides of the ship, but it was only sound, and the deck was, for once, steady. A light breakfast had been set out on deck for them, and the researchers were either all down with the mechanical probe or still in their beds after a night of astronomy work, and really, Obi-Wan thought. His Master's queue was not lying down flat at all.

In fact, it wasn't even really properly on the back of his head -- Qui-Gon had made efforts, it was clear, but it actually stuck out the side of his head, somewhat behind his ear.

It was the Republic's worst Padawan braid, really.

Qui-Gon looked up from his juice. Frowned.

"Sorry." Obi-Wan gave him a vastly apologetic look and resumed trying, with all his heart, to fight the smirk off his face.

...

Qui-Gon did not braid his hair very often. It was heavy enough so that it rarely got caught in a breeze, and it was coarse enough so that it resisted humidity fairly well. Obi-Wan had actually never seen his master in a queue until this, an utterly uninhabited marine planet in Republic territory with good sun, warmish oceans, and underwater ruins that were the remnants of an extinct, highly advanced native species.

All they had to do for this mission was sit on the ship. Keep an eye out for previously unknown hostiles. Give the researchers any aid they needed, monitor the sea floor mapping droid as it sent back reports. Sleep a great deal. Rest. The droids took care of all the shipwork; some of the researchers were on their third tour here, and Qui-Gon was recovering well enough that he began to come out onto the deck to meditate. The galley was surprisingly well-stocked; bi-Wan was experimenting with some of the native wildlife that the researchers had indicated was edible.

It was, Obi-Wan supposed, the Jedi version of a vacation.

...

"I am told that there are the remnants of old weather-control satellites in the atmosphere."

"Is that why the weather is always so pleasant here?"

"It seems so." Qui-Gon made a noise in his throat, peered at the report screen for the mapping droid that was covering the sea floor underneath. Reassured himself that all was going well, that the regular little ping really did indicate good health and progress, and then he settled back in his chair.

"The mild climate is, apparently, why there are so many near-sentient species on this planet. For some reason, the evolutionary chain started with a relatively high base level of intelligence, and since the weather is so mild, there was little reason from the environment to convert more of that intelligence into weaponry.

"One of the researchers -- I think it was Sarrd'an, one of the xenospecialists -- swears that the large fish we see by the bow like to play jokes. He's been splashed out of his dinghy more than once."

Obi-Wan didn't answer for a while, and when Qui-Gon looked over, he found that his Padawan had fallen asleep, head on hands. The remains of a very large lunch were on the floor behind them; they were sitting in the pilot house of the ship, and pretending to be someone that he wasn't was always an extra strain on Obi-Wan. He did not enjoy undercover, investigatory work at all; he liked diplomacy, open negotiations. Skulking around, poking into places where he did not belong was his least favorite sort of work, in fact, and having Andrann and Threll back-to-back had been hard on him.

They were the only ones, besides the droids, left onboard, and windows in the pilot's house had been opened to let the breeze through.

Qui-Gon reached over, tucked Obi-Wan's Padawan braid back behind his right ear, then turned down the volume on the mapping droid reports.

...

Besides the near-sentient fish, there were also the birds: enormous, broad-winged creatures that had nothing in the way of landing apparatus. As Obi-Wan understood it, they never landed. They were born on the wing; when their muscles had not yet developed enough to allow them to fly, they were borne by their parents, first in a specialized bit of skin and feather underneath the belly, then on the backs of their parents.

There were plenty of smaller animal species on the planet, of course, but Obi-Wan found himself watching them drift above the ship. It was odd, really. He was not fond of animals. He did not like undeveloped worlds.

...

"How is your shoulder?"

"Improving. It doesn't hurt that much."

Obi-Wan rubbed at the place where the shrapnel had gone through his shoulder; thanks to bacta, there was only the faintest of scars, but they had run into a fog bank that afternoon, and the sudden shift in barometric pressure had made it feel odd. He looked old, too, he knew, sitting there in the chair and rubbing and making a face.

"Now I know why old Jedi don't like weather rotations at the Temple Gardens."

Normally, Qui-Gon would have laughed and touched him on the shoulder. Now, though, he laughed and reached over and touched Obi-Wan on the cheek, a little below the cheekbone.

There were bunks in their cabin, but Qui-Gon's was too small for him. He couldn't get comfortable in it, and since they were set into the wall, there was no possibility of pushing two beds together to make a larger one. Qui-Gon slept on the floor between their beds, and he told Obi-Wan that he actually preferred the hard floor to a mattress that had, in any case, been too soft for him.

Also, additionally, it got him closer to Obi-Wan at night. Before, not only had Qui-Gon been wretchedly uncomfortable squeezed into that bunk, but he'd gotten up at least three times a night to check on his Padawan's breathing. It was hard to hear it from across the room, after all, with the creaking of the boat and the sound of the waves.

...

This was the single, longest stretch of interrupted peace that Qui-Gon had known since he became a Padawan. On Threll, as they were being airlifted on a platform out of the firefight by armored shuttle, Qui-Gon had to hold Obi-Wan to keep him from falling off. Been very careful not to move the tourniquet, jar the shredded leg more than he had to or put any pressure on the wounded shoulder. Fought down a surge of inappropriate fear when he realized that the stuff dripping onto his knee was his Padawan's blood. That it was cooling, rapidly, that the airlift might cool Obi-Wan's core temperature to the point where he would die before he reached the ship.

Obi-Wan had assumed that their stay on the ship was so that Qui-Gon could recover from the physical wounds of eight months of chancy undercover arms investigations. He had also assumed that Qui-Gon was the one who needed more recovery.

At night, Obi-Wan still muttered the names of streets from a particular planet that they had worked.

...

"One of the research scientists told me something today."

Qui-Gon stilled, turned his head a little to look at Obi-Wan. "Did you ask, or did he tell you?"

"I asked. I wanted to know what happened to the native species."

They were sitting on the floor together; Qui-Gon had his legs stretched out, and Obi-Wan was behind him. Earlier that evening, Qui-Gon brushed his hair out, and Obi-Wan now had hair looped over his fingers. A bit of twine was on the floor next to them.

Obi-Wan was planning it to do the end of Qui-Gon's queue, and there was a bit of cloth, too, from the repair kit for their robes that he was going to tie on there, too, and hide the twine. He promised that his braiding would be tight enough for Qui-Gon to sleep on, that if Qui-Gon didn't like the results, he could take the queue out, sleep on the hair, and no-one would ever know that Masters weren't supposed to have a braid that stuck out from the side of their head.

The talking, really, was to keep Qui-Gon's still while Obi-Wan finished.

"An interest in natural science is unlike you, Obi-Wan. I approve, though -- what did the researcher say?"

"Nobody knows where they went. Researchers have not seen any signs the natives discovered space travel, but they do know the natives were advanced enough to control the weather." A bit of a pause while Obi-Wan picked the twine up from the floor, wrapped it around the end of the queue.

"Some of the xenogeneticists think the fish we've been seeing and the birds are genetic relatives of the original natives. There is an uncanny degree of similarity between them. A mural in one of the cities that shows citydwellers becoming birds or growing scales. There are hints that they knew about large-scale genetic manipulation, but the accompanying texts don't say anything about that. Instead, all they talk about is."

Obi-Wan bit his lip, frowned as he pulled tight the knot on the queue.

"Transformation. Change through happiness."

...

By nightfall, the fog bank moved on, and the skies had cleared. Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon went up into the observatory platform with the astronomists to see the readings; eventually a cold wind came up, and while the astronomists couldn't leave, had to stay up there to complete their readings, Qui-Gon muttered about chills.

Obi-Wan raised his eyebrows, looked at him, but went along with it. He noted the fact that Qui-Gon was solicitous of that shoulder, took the stairs slowly and looked back to make sure that Obi-Wan wasn't having difficulty with them. It was just beginning to irritate Obi-Wan when Qui-Gon stopped, halfway down the stairs.

"Naboo," Qui-Gon said, pointing out a cluster of stars, just beyond a pair of red binaries, that Obi-Wan could barely see. "There's a Federation blockade there. Our next mission is on Stral. When I spoke to them today, though, the Council suggested that we may be there before too long."

Obi-Wan looked up from rubbing his shoulder. He could barely see the stars; he could see, much more clearly, even in the dim light of the electric torches on either side of the stairs, that in the hour that he'd had it, Qui-Gon had somehow managed to get his queue off-center.

...

Naboo did not come after Stral. After Stral, there was Alderaan, and after Alderaan, there was Corsucant for a brief while before Randra, where they stayed for two months, working out a peace accord.

Naboo did come after Randra, though, and that vacation, that space of eight days, was the last time that Obi-Wan ever saw his Master with a braid.

It would have been inappropriate to put it into a queue for a formal funeral, after all, and while he was dressing Qui-Gon for the funeral service, Obi-Wan didn't have the heart to put it into a braid, even to see what it would look like. He couldn't bring himself to do it; his shoulder ached in the cold of the morgue room, and it was, in fact, a long time and ways from Naboo -- two decades, Corsucant, Malastare, another water planet where they believed in genetic modification, Mustafar -- until Obi-Wan finally learned about transformation through joy.

Through love.





Fic inspired by this beautiful official concept art that [livejournal.com profile] randomalia posted of Qui-Gon in a braid. We got to talking about how he looks like a solo knight or, as [livejournal.com profile] neotoma suggested, like post-Xanatos, pre-Obi-Wan. :/ He looked so sad in that picture that I wanted to write about him being happy for once :/

The Obi-Wan speaking voice is off because even after scrutinizing the goddamn TPM script, like, three hundred times, I still have no idea how he talks. Blame [livejournal.com profile] stella_belli-wan for not being up at all hours of the day to do the hard work for me. :/

[identity profile] neotoma.livejournal.com 2005-11-15 05:08 pm (UTC)(link)
It was the Republic's worst Padawan braid, really.

I'd be giggling to. Poor Obi-Wan, trying to keep a straight face when his Master is being a doofus.

I love how quiet and gentle this story is, though I'm not sure if I'd call it 'happy'. Contemplative, maybe.

and it was, in fact, a long time and ways from Naboo -- three decades, Corsucant, Malastare, another water planet where they believed in genetic modification, Mustfar -- until Obi-Wan finally learned about transformation through joy.

Through love.


Mwaha! :whimper:

Though I think it was only two decades from this mission to Mustafar (13 years from TPM to RotS)... if you add Tatooine to the list, then it works, because it probably took Obi-Wan a long time to get the hang of blue-ghostiness.

[identity profile] quigonejinn.livejournal.com 2005-11-15 05:16 pm (UTC)(link)
Mm, yeah, I'd been thinking something similar -- twenty years, plus whatever it took for him to go ghostie, but it doesn't really make sense in the sequence, and I'd get reactions similar to yours a lot, so I changed it right after you potsed your comment. But yeah. God, after what Anakin did?

I imagine it would take a while to get to the universal compassion part of the blue ghosty. In a way, I'm surprised Obi-Wan managed it at all. <3

This started out as a much happier fic than it ended up, I think, but hey! Happy ending! Love and stuff!

[identity profile] neotoma.livejournal.com 2005-11-15 05:24 pm (UTC)(link)
I imagine it would take a while to get to the universal compassion part of the blue ghosty. In a way, I'm surprised Obi-Wan managed it at all. <3

So am I. I like Obi-Wan a lot, but he's a Sword through and through, not a Cup. His understanding of mercy is pretty much not there, even when he's Old Ben. And even as a blue-ghost, he's a bit rah-rah on the whole 'killing Vader!' front.

So how did he ever manage to become a blue ghost?

[identity profile] randomalia.livejournal.com 2005-11-15 10:22 pm (UTC)(link)
but he's a Sword through and through, not a Cup.

Which is interesting because of his name - loose (Lucas-style) translation of sword-belt or something.

I have this vague idea of Obi-Wan as having such a tolerance for his own horrible experience in life that he thinks others should be able to bear suffering like that, too. Because that's part of life and that's the right thing to do. Doing his duty and 'the right thing' is so important to him; he doesn't show much mercy to those that fail in that.

I wonder (given his 'certain point of view' ideas) if perhaps he saw killing Vader as a compassionate measure?

[identity profile] neotoma.livejournal.com 2005-11-16 02:11 pm (UTC)(link)
Like I've said before, Obi-Wan has no mercy in him. He truly can't understand how people buckle and fail under suffering, because he's always toughed it out.

I wonder (given his 'certain point of view' ideas) if perhaps he saw killing Vader as a compassionate measure?

Hmm... that's a good thought. Especially when combined with the 'more machine than man' line; given how uncomfortable Obi-Wan was with piloting and droids, he might have thought that a fate worse than death, especially when combined with the Dark side...

[identity profile] randomalia.livejournal.com 2005-11-16 11:03 pm (UTC)(link)
Especially when combined with the 'more machine than man' line

Yes, nice one. I think he would have preferred Anakin to have had a clean death (if only not at Obi-Wan's hands) rather than a corrupted sort of half-life as Vader. I think Obi-Wan's view compassion would be influenced by who he is, even in the Force.

[identity profile] quigonejinn.livejournal.com 2005-11-16 04:30 am (UTC)(link)
I. Have. No. Idea. In a way, given how snarly and black and white QUi-Gon is right at teh start of TPM, I'm surprised that he managed to get to it, too, and without the benefit of eight jillion years of practice.

There's some tickling little voice in the back of my head that says QUi-Gon learned it from somebody else? That he didn't, like, come up with it entirely himself?

And my god. In that icon, Obi-Wan's hair looks uncannily like Dana Scully's. x_x

[identity profile] neotoma.livejournal.com 2005-11-16 02:15 pm (UTC)(link)
In a way, given how snarly and black and white QUi-Gon is right at teh start of TPM, I'm surprised that he managed to get to it, too, and without the benefit of eight jillion years of practice.


Qui-Gon certainly sounded grumpy and abosultist, but his actions were noticeably less so -- he was amazingly forebearing with Jar-Jar, considering what a screw-up *he* was.

Hmmm... you are postulating that Qui-Gon had someone whispering in his ear? And he didn't mention this to anyone because he didn't need to seem any kookier than he already did to the other Jedi?

:snerk: The Jedi mullet strikes again!

[identity profile] mozart.livejournal.com 2005-11-15 09:03 pm (UTC)(link)
It would have been inappropriate to put it into a queue for a formal funeral, after all, and while he was dressing Qui-Gon for the funeral service, Obi-Wan didn't have the heart to put it into a braid, even to see what it would look like. He couldn't bring himself to do it; his shoulder ached in the cold of the morgue room, and it was, in fact, a long time and ways from Naboo -- two decades, Corsucant, Malastare, another water planet where they believed in genetic modification, Mustafar -- until Obi-Wan finally learned about transformation through joy.

Through love.


I, honest to god, began to cry.

[identity profile] quigonejinn.livejournal.com 2005-11-16 04:37 am (UTC)(link)
Oh, baby. *hands you tissue* Never cry because of one of my lameass endings. By now, you should know how I write them -- TOTALLY CHEESY AND OUT OF MY ASS AT THE LAST MINUTE, SO.

[identity profile] randomalia.livejournal.com 2005-11-15 10:09 pm (UTC)(link)
Ohhh how much I love this. The way you say such important things indirectly, tell us about events through their impact on the characters, and give these little glimpses of the feelings they have.

I started quoting all the bits that I adored and then it was kind of everything, so I'm restraining myself. Obi-Wan's preoccupation with Qui-Gon's queue (and Qui-Gon's queue itself <3), and the way Qui-Gon fusses without Obi-Wan really knowing about it, and the change through happiness, through love duality. Gorgeous.

I don't think your Obi-Wan speaking voice is off. TPM!Obi is hard to pin down because we don't get much in the way of non-mission talk from him. Nothing extended, anyway. This felt true to Obi-Wan for me, in any case. It felt right for both characters.

[identity profile] quigonejinn.livejournal.com 2005-11-16 04:54 am (UTC)(link)
Ahah. Does it? I worry a lot about that because it seems like all of my characters end up talking that way, so I was sitting at the computer at 10AM this morning screaming and bawling and yelling, "HE DOESN'T USE 'THAT' THAT STUPID FUCKING RUNTY PADAWAN NEVER USES THAT GODDAMN WORD WHY THE FUCK NOT AUUUUUUUUGH CTRL F CTRL F CTRL F."

But yeah, thanks. :D Character speech is something that I'm really trying to work on, so I'm glad that it worked for you.

And ahah. Oh, the queue. It's entirely your thing, you know, and now I can't go more than ten or fifteen minutes without running back to the computer to look at that picture. Qui-Gon, man. It just makes my heart hurt. I love that little bit at the temples that he can't quite get into the queue. I love the expression. I love how closely-trimmed the beard is. It's what gave me the title for this story, man. I keep looking at htat and thinking that he's the saddest pirate ever. :(

(By the way, one of the other commenters to this story was wondering about the pic. Is it OK to link her to it?)

[identity profile] randomalia.livejournal.com 2005-11-16 10:36 pm (UTC)(link)
Obi-Wan has very careful speech, I think. Not careful as in diplomatic - he's very forthright with Qui-Gon in some instances in TPM, and hello, pathetic lifeforms. The closest I can get to a similie is thinking of Jane Austen male characters when they're not at pains to be social. Which is a stupid example. :I But the speech in this fic sounded like Obi-Wan to me anyway. <3

Oh, sad pirate :( I love that pic of Qui-Gon; it's one of the few ones of him looking vulnerable. Even when he's dying he's holding it together and being guarded, except for that little moment when he smiles which is jldsjdajkl. But that pic... I can just see him leaning over something, distracted, the short bits of his hair falling forward. I also somehow think his bare neck feels exposed after seeing him with all that hair everywhere.

Sorry I took so long on the pic link question. Feel free to link it whenever. :)

guarded is such a good word for qui-gon. <3

[identity profile] quigonejinn.livejournal.com 2005-11-18 01:32 am (UTC)(link)
CANON CANON CANON CANO --

That's my instinctual response whenever I see an icon of that scene. Holy Christ. It really, really, really is, and then, for about fifteen seconds afterwards, all I can do is draw little hearts around them and think about the happy little Island of Rhod upon which Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan now live and raise puppies and have an herb garden under the palm trees and Qui-Gon has a little boat that he paddles out onto the sea sometimes when he wants a little peace and quiet and then he falls asleep out there and Obi-Wan yells at him when he comes back and.

Damn you, though. Now I want to write a fic about Qui-Gon with short hair and Obi-Wan thinking, too, about his Master's neck. *_*

island!! <3

[identity profile] randomalia.livejournal.com 2005-11-19 12:37 am (UTC)(link)
I like the thought that Obi-Wan would find ordinary things erotic where Qui-Gon is concerned. The line of his neck bared, the small gape of the v of his tunics, insides of his wrists when his robe pulls back... O.O I mean, it seems to really fit with my idea of Obi-Wan and his sort of propriety, and the want he just radiates, and his sense of distance from Qui-Gon. Little intimacies.

[identity profile] shoiryu.livejournal.com 2005-11-15 11:15 pm (UTC)(link)
This is lovely, and moving in its tiny intricate pieces. I love it.

[identity profile] quigonejinn.livejournal.com 2005-11-16 05:12 am (UTC)(link)
Glad you do, man. I was working on a piece of fic for someone last night, trying to get a feel for what she liked, and I found one of yours that she'd memoried -- it was a Vader one about slavery. It just knocked me clean off my feet, so yeah.

Getting FB from you today is a double pleasure. ^_^

[identity profile] shoiryu.livejournal.com 2005-11-16 05:20 am (UTC)(link)
Aw! :D Thanks! (I saw you'd friended me, so I wandered on over to see what you looked like, and BAM this was here, so, yes. My other much loved pairing.)

[identity profile] quigonejinn.livejournal.com 2005-11-18 01:00 am (UTC)(link)
Q/O, Q/O, Q/O. It's ridiculous. I remember watching TPM when I was seventeen and not really paying attention to the scrawny little short dude that they'd stuck dear Liam with, and then bam! When I rewatched it a few years later, the Undying True Lovie between ShaggyLiam and the Short Dude were all I could see onscreen. XD

[identity profile] rabidfangurl.livejournal.com 2005-11-16 04:07 am (UTC)(link)
Lovely fic. Though I wanna know: where's the art? *is curious*

[identity profile] neotoma.livejournal.com 2005-11-16 04:33 pm (UTC)(link)
It's concept art for Qui-Gon -- it's on is Behind the Scenes page at the Starwars Databank

[identity profile] quigonejinn.livejournal.com 2005-11-18 12:58 am (UTC)(link)
Damn, but I'm a bit late, but uh. Yeah! What she said!

And I'm glad you liked it. I always feel a little twitchy wondering what the response to Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan that skirts the edge of being Q/O and yet isn't reallyQ/O.

[identity profile] imadra-blue.livejournal.com 2005-11-16 04:50 am (UTC)(link)
Awwww. This was very peaceful and gentle, like the planet, and I loved it lots. I love how you describe all the birds and fish and the planet, and do the SF stuff I LOVE to see in SW, and tie it in so beautifully to Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon's later transformations. I like how dorky Qui-Gon is in spots, and how much he cares about Obi-WAn. *sniffles* And you killed me with the ending. *wails* ;_;

[identity profile] quigonejinn.livejournal.com 2005-11-18 01:36 am (UTC)(link)
Ahah. The ending, the ending. I'm a little embarassed because it just seems to fall out of nowhere, and I was worried that NOBODY WOULD GET THE PARALLELISM AND THEN WOULDN'T I JUST BE THE BIG LOSER AHHAHAHAHA LAUGH AT RHOD.

<3 quiet Q/O, man. There's such depth of feeling there with the two of them, and neither of them is ever the sort to come out and say it straight-up. Not the good stuff, at least.

[identity profile] imadra-blue.livejournal.com 2005-11-18 08:49 am (UTC)(link)
I loved the ending, and I thought it worked beautifully, personally. Fit right in.

Honestly, I think any relationship with Obi-Wan involves a lot of avoidance of discussing feelings. Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan, most definitely on both sides, with Obi-Wan probably quite convinced he's not as loved as he actually is. While with Anakin, Anakin may or may not talk about his feelings (he's a feelings man, but not as open with Obi-Wan as he is Padme), but either way, poor Obi-Wan keeps his mouth shut. *pets him*

[identity profile] hlglne.livejournal.com 2005-11-16 09:14 pm (UTC)(link)
My Qui-Gon shall have a queue, on Ord Sigatt. You are inspirational with your psyching out of their love. <3

[identity profile] quigonejinn.livejournal.com 2005-11-18 01:36 am (UTC)(link)
It's not psyching out so much as the fact that, in my head, they're constitutionally incapable of ever talking about it.

Or, you know. Ever getting it on. DAMN THEM.

[identity profile] hlglne.livejournal.com 2005-11-18 02:52 am (UTC)(link)
Poor baby! mine had no trouble at all...though they did have some trouble admitting that they were,like, not simply practicing Jedi hygeine.

[identity profile] amchau.livejournal.com 2005-11-18 09:40 am (UTC)(link)
Aw, that's lovely. Sad at the end, but at least they were happy for a little while.

[identity profile] quigonejinn.livejournal.com 2005-11-20 08:04 pm (UTC)(link)
A little while. <3 I think that's all they can get in the canonverse -- I mean, even when Qui-Gon shows up all ghostie, it's gonna suck for Obi-Wan.

Thanks for read. :D

[identity profile] polgarawolf.livejournal.com 2008-03-31 12:45 am (UTC)(link)
*Snerk* You realize, don't you, that his learning about transformation "for love" and the reason why he allows himself to be "killed" means your ending supports an Obi/Ani relationship instead of one with Qui-Gon, don't you?